Woman optimistic Canyon Lake can be an alcohol-free haven

BY Aprile McKinnon

Marissa Charest moved to Canyon Lake in December 2019. Just a couple of months later COVID-19 hit and everything locked down. That’s when the drinking spiraled out of control.

Moving to Canyon Lake was the perfect solution for Marissa and Brett Charest. The newlyweds were searching for properties with boat docks and horses, which naturally led them to Canyon Lake. Driving in from the Los Angeles area, they looked at 13 houses in one day. They loved the lake and bought a lakefront home. Shortly thereafter they were moved in and they both fell in love with all that Canyon Lake had to offer.

They felt that Canyon Lake was a more family-oriented community than the city and wanted to be in a safer environment to start a family.

Marissa appreciated that in Canyon Lake it was socially acceptable to drink every day of the week during various activities.

“Drinking was even happening on boats and golf carts,” Marissa said. “And the community loves a party.”

It felt normal to drink in Canyon Lake.

“After our wedding, I stopped paying attention to what I was consuming and I didn‘t take care of myself,” Marissa said. “It was a gradual decline, and because of the nature of our community, it was very difficult to realize that I wasn‘t drinking like everyone else was.”

With COVID-19 in full swing, they started drinking a lot.

“I didn‘t worry about things during COVID,” she said. “Going out in the golf cart, everything revolved around drinking. We‘d grab a ‚road soda‘ for the golf cart ride to one bar, stop at the market or gas station for another, and then make our way to another bar, drink after drink after drink. It feels like it‘s encouraged. I knew I was struggling with how much I was consuming, but I didn‘t see it as a problem, even though my husband had been encouraging me to cut back and moderate.”

Photo by Aprile DeAnne McKinnon

After a year of being secluded because of the pandemic, the drinking worsened. It was the holidays that year when things began to crash.

“On Christmas day, my dad and I stayed up after my husband went to bed,” Marissa said. “My dad was drinking his whiskey, and I drank an entire rare $200 bottle of Mezcal that was gifted to my husband from a client. I put the empty bottle back, and my body didn‘t reject it. I woke up the next day with the worst hangover imaginable, but then I realized that I consumed a dangerous amount of alcohol and all it gave me was a bad hangover. At that moment, I knew I had a physical problem, and this is officially real bad and could kill me. I knew my health was suffering, my relationships were suffering, and I had convinced myself that I had an incurable panic disorder.”

Marissa said she realized she needed to change. She was ready to reframe her life and started her journey of living an alcohol-free (AF) lifestyle. She asked the local Canyon Lake Market to start carrying some of her favorite alcohol-free drinks and noticed that after these drinks were offered at the market that they started to sell quickly.

Because of this, Marissa knew there were others in Canyon Lake who might be doing the same thing she was now doing…living a life without alcohol. COVID-19 did seem to be a time where people, like herself, started drinking more, and maybe there were others who also saw the need to cut back or stop drinking altogether.

Marissa was concerned about being judged by those around her.

“I was hesitant to share my story for fear of judgment,” Marissa said. “Realizing there are definitely others here who feel like they also have to hide, motivates me to share what I’m going through. Perhaps this article will help inspire others to be more open about it.”

It is hard to put yourself in a vulnerable situation, but Marissa believed in sharing her story and started posting on social media about her journey.

“Reframe has been an amazing find for me,” she said. “It has absolutely changed my life.”

Marissa didn’t just quit cold turkey. She began by going alcohol free for 19 days in December, then it was five days here and there. Then on Feb. 27 something in Marissa changed and that became day one of her 100-day video.

On Feb. 27, Marissa found an app called Reframe. This app has been a huge part of her success. This app is for both people who just want to cut down and for those who want to stop altogether. It has tools to use to help people get through the times that are most difficult.

Not only does Reframe have tools to use, but it has a whole community of people who want to connect, support, and hang out together. That is where Marissa met a wonderful group of women she connected with.

“Reframe has helped me and I am so thankful,” Marissa said. “It makes me feel better.”

Reframe has meetings multiple times a day, a forum available 24/7 where users can post and comment, an entire area of meditation and mindfulness and there are daily tasks that earn users coins which add up and can be cashed in for t-shirts and other rewards.

Day 26 of being alcohol free, Marissa flew out to Kentucky where three of the girls she met on Reframe lived.

“Christine posted that she was struggling because she had no alcohol-free friends. Next thing I knew, we were texting all day every day,” Marissa said. “Two more girls, Joline and Sierra, joined in and we had group chats. We laughed in uncontrollable laughter, without any substance, and I didn‘t know that was possible. I felt like I was alone in this AF journey before I connected with these guys. Yeah, I went to the meetings, but I was grasping for a real connection.”

Christine and Joline, and two other Reframe ladies, Kat and Whitney, came out to Canyon Lake earlier this month to visit. They fell in love with the lake and experienced all the lake had to offer from an AF perspective.

“We were floating in the lake and we realized we had been out relaxing and not drinking,” Marissa said. “It was such a good feeling. Hanging out on the water without alcohol.”

While the ladies were visiting, they had the opportunity to celebrate with Whitney who had made it to 90 days AF. Dinner, cake and some mocktails with great conversation made it a special day while looking out onto the beautiful lake. The new friends are planning another get together at the lake when Joline celebrates her one-year alcohol-free anniversary.

“For the first time in my life, I have a group of friends where we support each other as a group and also individually,” Marissa said. “I didn‘t realize there are adults that are capable of this type of friendship, and I didn’t know I would be lucky enough to be a part of such a loving, supportive, empowering, and inspiring group of humans.”

Leaving the alcohol behind is almost like grieving the loss of a loved one, Marissa said.

“Being alcohol free means having to say goodbye,” she said. “Alcohol gives you those high highs, which are really hard to leave behind. But being AF means you don‘t get the low, lows. The high highs are not worth the low lows, and I would rather be level and present.”

Marissa has had articles printed and many photos featured in The Friday Flyer. She loves to stay creative and enjoys Canyon Lake so much with all its activities. Canyon Lake is a wonderful place to connect with nature.

Marissa and Brett love their canine family and enjoy all the lake has to offer. Now she has found a new life in Canyon Lake. Even though most activities focus on drinking, she has found herself to be full of life and freedom.

Marissa wants to inspire, encourage, and support others in the community. It isn’t easy to step away from alcohol, but the rewards outweigh the difficulty, she said.

On Marissa’s 100-day Instagram post, she said how she feels and what she is going through. Marissa is real, raw, vulnerable and an inspiration. Marissa is inviting others in the community to join her new Facebook and Instagram page where she hopes to make friends who want to join her at Canyon Lake events and have some other activities that are focused on AF activities.

“Whether you want to just cut back or join the AF life, I want to let you know you can do it,” she said. “Joining our group, which is called, ‘Canyon Lake Beyond the Bottle,’ is the first step.”

Reframe, the app that Marissa and her friends use, is available at all device app stores. Reframe is an alternative to AA. There are no 12 steps and there are no requirements for how to navigate your journey.

Reframe is an alcohol habit change app, with tools, tasks, and an insanely supportive community. The platform is designed for people struggling with their relationship with alcohol to find the tools, skills and emotional connections needed to make such an impactful lifestyle change.

“I can’t explain how happy I am to not be hiding myself anymore,” Marissa said. “If you’re confused or curious or considering going alcohol free, it’s not a cake walk, or a diamond-encrusted life over here…but it’s worth every single second of the work. I promise.”

For those who would like to connect with Marissa, email her at marissachrst@gmail.com or look her up on social media and her new page, “Canyon Lake Beyond the Bottle.”